My mother

For so long my mother has been the rock of which my faith was built. I looked to her for wisdom instead of going to God for the answers. As children we always thought that mom was an angel and that any minute God was going to take her from us. Do not misunderstand, there were times that I could be so angry at her because she would not let me have my way. But I now realize that she was what I was basing my relationship with Jesus on..no wonder I have struggled with my walk because I so desperatley wanted mine to mirror her's. As we as a family are going through this season of trial with my mom battling breast cancer, I have slowly began to feel the Lord wooing me to Himself and showing me that He did not make us the same and there was a purpose for that. He wants a personal relationship with me and that does not mean that it will be the same walk as my mom. People ask me how I am doing or dealing with mom's diagnosis, and most of these people know me very well and how close I am to my mother. How much I have depended on her for my "salvation". I am slowly and akwardly beginning to see that God has a path for me and that I need not look to others to find the way that He would have me go